how do you get passed the quick start screen without havig to choose manual setup

These support pages should get you started with setup of your new iPad - and the methods of transferring your data from old to new iPad:

Set up your iPhone, iPad or iPod touch – Apple Support

Transfer data from your previous iOS device to your new iPhone, iPad, or iPod touch - Apple Support

Use Quick Start to transfer data to a new iPhone, iPad or iPod touch – Apple Support

If the donor iPad, from which you are transferring your data precedes iOS12.4, QuickStart will not be available.

“Transfer” is rather a misnomer. In reality, your data and setup is merely cloned to the new device. Nothing is moved or removed from the original device.

An alternative is to restore either an iCloud or iTunes backup to the new device:

How to back up your iPhone, iPad and iPod touch – Apple Support

Restore your iPhone, iPad, or iPod touch from a backup - Apple Support

What iOS/iPadOS version is currently running on your old iPad? (settings>general>about>software version?)

If it runs a version earlier than 12.4, you can't use the "quick start" method.

You need to create a backup (1), then restore data from that backup (2)

(1) --> How to back up your iPhone, iPad, and iPod touch – Apple Support

(2) --> Restore your iPhone, iPad, or iPod touch from a backup

Regards

Giulio