How do I access a deceased loved one Apple ID?

i recently got a phone of a loved one who passed away from a family member but icant get the apple id off of it because we dont know the password for it and the number for the apple id is nolonger in used how can i go about getting this off i tried everything and even called apple support they took me thru a process on how to recovery the apple id password for it and we did that and now i cant use the phone thats in my name with my phone how can i put my new apple id in a phone when i cant get the old apple id out .

[Re-Titled by Moderator]