How can I use my Airpods with Voice Control while on phone calls?

I am quadriplegic and rely on Voice Control (with Show Numbers) to make phone calls, but I've never been able to hang up my own calls — I always have to rely on the person I'm speaking to, to hang up. Also, I cannot navigate options on call trees. I know this has to do with sharing the microphone with the phone function instead of Voice Control. Now I've purchased Airpods, Second Generation, to help me navigate these situations (a recurring notification on my iPhone seems to suggest this would be possible), but it almost never works. The Show Number options are not visible when I am on a call. Running iOS 17.6.1 on an iPhone SE, with Airpods, Second Generation.